GOBLIN LIFE

Governing body of the Goblin Nation. Corrupt, prone to lotus binges and 16-day raves, still in the funny robes. Briefly rebranded the Goblin Clowncil.

Takes reports of suspicious activity, including your own.

Council department for misleading thumbnails and outrageous headlines. Started the lizard-people rumor.

Bankrupt after putting 100% of its funds into PachinkoCoin days before the pachinko ban.

Confirms orcs are real. Dropped the shredded orcish history books on the papier-mâché market.

Its drone filmed Gordon Ramsay fleeing with antacid.

A task force investigating the potluck-raid task force. Its cover-up finding spawned the Obfuscation and Misdirection Squad (OAMS).

Ad agency of state: grandma Facebook ads, merch, and the Goblin Ale campaign that drowned GoblinNet in drunk posts.

Regulator whose 'Gnome Brains' labels allow any species.

Dr. Gloopglop's department, Burn Unit included. Ignored by everyone.

Lost the GI Bill funds and told veterans to be grateful.

Managed by Grungle from a cardboard box behind the Wash & Dash.

National defense division with erratic border skirmishes.

Built and shelved the pocket Party Cannon.

Runs the explosive piñata program, stuffed with the Council's shredded archives.

Built the Mini-Doom Ball, made Dunk Crater, and was shut down over the mutants it produced.

'The Party Platoon' of the Goblin-Troll War of '93. Brought Pastafarianism home from Jamaica.

Praises asteroid mining and pyramid-scheme design.

Local legislature that passed the end-every-meeting-with-a-walk motion 7-0.

Chaotic legislative body, dissolved and turned into a rave venue by the Elders.

Chrono-Crypt agency, codename CLEAN-SWEEP. Keeps the timeline tidy.

Chrono-Crypt agency, codename GREEN-WIRE. Always listening.

Chrono-Crypt agency, codename SEWER-SHADOW. The truth is under there.

Dr. Gloopnoodle's institute: the Eyelid Delusion and the cycling-narcissism study (n=10).

Publishes the meme BrownPapers.

Mudwick Isle research institute and GNN's main source of citable research BrownPapers.

Hiccup cure, weaponized basketballs.

Titusville institute headed by Dr. Barker that bred the BDCD and built the Scentoscope.

GRI college emptied of all smell by the Scentoscope's black-hole scent vacuum.

Mental Gymnastics Bootcamp, Lock Picking 101, Emotional Security Bootcamp.

Titusville lab behind the Muscle Max exoskeleton and the Thought Cooler helmet.

In-universe news organization. Mascot: Meow Zedong.

Casinos, nightclubs and military lapel pins. Its HQ was burned down by the Council.

GGG's parent company. Won the five-quintillion-dollar lapel pin contract.

Network behind Clanily Bloodfued.

Astral network. Its channel Spooky Entertainment Television (SET) airs Grubberies, Gobl-ins and Gruel.

The Goblin Nation's premier social media platform and comment-war venue.

The Council's official newsletter, delivered every full moon.

Power plant converting harvested human cringe into electricity.

Company behind the Dwarf Eggs scam. In hiding.

Syndicate profiting from fitted-sheet discrepancies and shrinkage.

Monopoly concealing biological nail-length termination thresholds.

Miners demanding nap pods under threat of fool's gold substitution.

Regulator of goblin street racing in stolen Japanese sports cars.

Three mutant crabs made the team.

GRI-proposed pro league for BDCD basketball and baseball.

Sued the Council over 'Goblin Clowncil'.

Curators of the 'Golden Void'.

Mental Gymnastics students behind Operation Mindwarp.

Anti-gambling campaign that backfired and drove goblins to casinos.

Plagiarized human CSS for the GoblinLife.org redesign. Sentenced to eternal spam-filter duty.

Off-key chanting and an out-of-tune lute: the Council's reserve weapon against the Inquisition.

Goblins who have renounced the flesh in favor of debating diphthongs.

Prankster honor promised to the nuclear whistleblower before his planned execution.

Clandestine rebel network spreading factual, sourced information. Causes widespread dismay.

Subterranean overlords: Goblins, Lizard People, Mole People, Silicon Valley and media.

Use ganja oil in the sacred spaghetti sauce.

Use basil in the sacred spaghetti sauce. Based in Rigatonia.

Extremist sect led by the Noodle Prophet, allied with trolls and gnome mercenaries.

Rigatonian extremists calling for holy war over poisoned pasta sauce.

Insurgent force of the Rigatonian breakaway movement. Lost in the smoke as peacekeepers.

Masked orcish militants whose dung-bombing zeppelin raid proved orcs are real.

Nationalists against the Pixie-Powered Pooper and the readmitted gnomes.

Pixie bloc in a conflict with the Squirrel Empire that both sides say isn't happening.

Shadowy group blamed for Fieri's disappearance. Its silence is taken as proof.

Generation Alpha Centauri youths who communicate in astrophysics Discord shitposts.

North Korean unit that defected to the Squirrel Empire for its fermented acorn stew.

Settled by debtors picked in a rigged lottery. Seceded in tail-hats.